Psychopathic & Narcissistic abuse can leave deep and long lasting effects on it’s victims, especially when you are involved in long term relationships with these toxic personality types. The aftermath of toxic relationships with Cluster B personality disordered people are best worked through with a qualified therapist or counsellor.
See the video below for a superb summary by Richard Grannon of exactly the kind of help that will be most effective when recovering from a relationship with a psychopath/narcissist/borderline personality.
Here are his 5 essential things to look for in a therapist, coach or counsellor:
- Knowledge of Cluster B personality disorders and/or Complex Trauma (C-PTSD), preferably both. This is the crucial factor any therapist you work with must have!!
- Healing Focused – willing to talk about the past but also focused on moving forward and moving on from the abuse – build new networks, connections, lifestyle, friends, etc.
- Approaches the therapy with a compassion and humor when appropriate – adds a lightness of touch to the process.
- Down to earth – approachable and treats you like a fellow human and not an object to be studied.
- Will when necessary give negative feedback and challenge your thinking and beliefs when faulty – doesn’t just agree with you 100% of the time.
Finding a Therapist
Here are some links to follow to find a suitable therapist in your area, broken down by country.
- USA – very wide availablity and multiple online search directories. Here are a couple:
- UK – two main accrediting bodies for therapist – UKCP & BACP.
- Canada – See Goodtherapy.org site for a search feature by ZIP code and state.
- Australia – See the APS Search Page or Goodtherapy AU page to find a therapist.
Understanding the Intersection Between Complex Trauma & Cluster B Personalities
A crucial point to understand for so many victims of psychopathic/narcissistic abuse to understand is how and why the toxic person targeted them in the first place.
This often has to do with unresolved wounds (complex trauma/C-PTSD) the person was carrying, often from childhood, which Cluster B personality disordered people (psychopaths/sociopath/borderlines/narcissists) often unfortunately have an uncanny knack of very quickly “seeing” and honing in on.
Once they find your particular wounds or trauma, this is precisely what they often hammer away at with their toxic abuse, traumatizing you in the present as well as re-opening old wounds from the past.
This is why these toxic personalities can cause so much damage to their victims, requiring so much professional help to resolve afterwards. See the excellent video below by Richard Grannon for more on this fundamental point – it is very important victims of psychopaths/narcissists realize this.
Thankfully there is hope – resolve your own emotional wounds and you take away the psychopath’s ability to exploit and poke at those wounds. You leave them nothing to feed off. Use the search features above to find a suitable therapist trained in trauma (PTSD/Complex PTSD) who can help you do that.
Finding a good therapist is so important to get right for this work that I’m doing a whole separate E-Book (about 5000 words long) on it. Please sign up below if interested.